I'm Sad...........

I wish I could express differently what I am going through right now, but honestly all I can say today is that I am sad. I'm sad that I didn't get that final hug and kiss from my Grandma May before she went to be with Grandpa & Jesus. I'm sad that I don't have anymore grandparents alive. I'm sad that my kids don't have them(great-grandparents) either. I'm sad that things have turned out the way they have any so many areas of my life, but also blessed so much more than I could ever even imagine. Crazy, I know....I'm just sad. A time of mourning for me was just pushed to the side so that we could celebrate Christmas....I wouldn't change that for the world, but today I realized that it is okay to be sad for awhile and miss her a little bit more.

*this is what I wrote and then read at Grandma's funeral:

12/22/2009
A song kept going over and over in my head as I began to start to put my thoughts to paper I realized that I just needed to share part of it that completely sums up my wonderful Grandma May. The woman that I want to strive to be. The kind of wife and mother that loves her husband, children & grandchildren so much more than life itself.

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name apologetically
And leave that kind of legacy(Nichole Nordeman-Legacy)


As “her favorite” granddaughter……which if you knew her then you know that if you were with her at that moment you were her favorite.



I was privileged to get to not only have this precious woman as my grandmother, but to also have her as my friend. As an adult I spoke to her nearly everyday on the phone.
Every morning if I hadn’t called her by about 10 then I knew that I would be getting a call soon. She had know idea how much I depended on that phone call even though there might not be anything going on special in her life; at that moment I was able to just hear her sweet voice.

Then I was blessed with my son, Tyler, who just came at the right time when there hadn’t been a baby in the family in awhile, so then of course he soaked up lots of attention from both Grandma and Grandpa. Grandma just loved having him over to her house. He was such a lover that truly just ate every bit of the hugs and kisses that she poured out upon him. Rocking and humming…rock a bye baby…

Sweet Keely came along soon after and even though she wasn’t as smitten as Tyler was with Grandma….Grandma loved her just the same. I remember finally telling Grandma that something wasn’t quiet right with Keely and her crying with me and telling me that it was going to be okay.
God had a purpose for Keely and even now I hold on to that…..We were later given the privilege of living next door to her and Grandpa. Who knew that Keely would become such a great little nurse maid to both of them. She loved going to check on them several times a day. God knew exactly what He was doing for both them and her.

Even though she was able to meet the my twins, Marlee and Maggie May, she didn’t remember them at times, but one time I received a call from Aunt Lonna on her way out of town telling me that Grandma had told her about the twins. I was thrilled because she hadn’t known me in long time at that point, but once again God gave me those words as a gift that day.

When I look at the amazing 4 children she raised I pray that I can do the same.
Love them all and be there for all of them!

Proverbs 31 speaks of the virtuous wife and that is indeed what you are Grandma…..

Proverbs 31:25-31

Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many daughters have done well.
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the fruit of her hands.
And let her own works praise her in the gates.


Finally, Grandma I want to say to you……..
"Well Done" good and faithful one…..WELL DONE! I love you dearly and will miss you my sweet friend! Thank for the great hugs, kisses & laughs.
~Sweet Grandma May~